Showing Up to Build Connections

Success as a manager is much more likely if you focus on building connections. 

You must bring your team together so they feel connected to each other and the projects they’re doing. You should build ties with other managers and colleagues throughout the company so you can help them or ask for their assistance. You need to connect with your supervisor to ensure you’re on the same page with them and meeting (or, hopefully, exceeding) their expectations. 

Of those connections, the links within your team may be the most important. I’m not basing this on a gut feeling. Years of poring over the results of employee engagement surveys have provided me with ample evidence that people want to feel connected to their colleagues and managers while at work. And when it comes to building those connections, they look to middle managers for help. 

While there are many ways for middle managers to strengthen those ties, one that is often overlooked is the simple act of showing up, whether to training events, formal team meetings, or company celebrations. 

The people who report to you are watching what you do. They want to know you support them and the organization, and they want to see you actively doing so. If they perceive that you are absent most or all the time, they’re less likely to trust you, which means they’re more likely to question your motives and actions. 

To be “present” for your team and help them feel more connected, you’ve got to attend the meetings or training activities that interest them—even if they don’t interest you. It’s easy to find excuses to skip those kinds of events because you’ll always have plenty of “real work” to do, and going to yet another meeting is probably not your idea of fun. However, seeing you there—either in person or virtually—has a positive impact on your team members. 

For example, sitting with them in a training meeting shows them you care about what they are learning, you are willing to take the time to learn along with them, and you don’t think you know everything. In one of my recent management positions, I attended trainings not specifically targeted to me or my team because I knew it was important for members of the leadership team to be present and to participate.

Even more important is to attend events and activities related to your organization’s employee resource groups. If you, as a manager, attend as many of these events as possible, it sends a message to your team members that they should also feel comfortable attending and participating in these groups. ERGs can be an important source of connection and support, and that’s a message you’ll want to reinforce.

When you do show up, you must be engaged. Participate in the conversation when appropriate. Turn your camera on if you’re attending via video call. Avoid distractions and pay attention to the discussion. Follow up with team members to discuss their impressions after an event or meeting. This not only sets a good example for your team members and helps you build connections with them, but also makes it a better experience for you. You’re much more likely to get something meaningful out of an activity if you’re trying to stay engaged and not constantly checking email or multitasking in other ways.

You’re not going to have time to go to every event that pops up on your calendar, but you should try to be there for as many as possible. It may require extra time and effort, but the resulting boost in trust and engagement among your team members will be worth it.

Do you agree that showing up is an important part of management? What steps have you taken to build connections with and among your team members? Please share your thoughts in the comments, and let’s talk about it.